This whole week I have been receiving text messages from friends saying, “Are you stoked to fight next week?” It’s hard for me to respond in texts.
I am a predator. I am the one you are preparing for in your self defense classes. My mindset is not to see if I can do this, I am not fighting for some mystical cause, all I will do is to inflict maximum damage and subject my opponent to a level of violence that he has never felt before. I will expose him to pain and break his will so that he will make mistakes that will allow me to finish the fight. Every time a spark of doubt arises inside me I extinguish it by training and perfecting my techniques that will allow me to win. Some say, “Train smarter, not harder.” Bullshit. Do both. Do more.
Fighting is complex in the sense of the scope of what you need to know. This is not a sport where you come off the street and expect to learn everything in a few months(like so many seem to think), there is only one way to adequately prepare yourself. Action. Fighting is simple in the sense that you don’t need to do anything more then punch him in the face. People seem to forget the simplicity of it.
My confidence is bred in a real place. Success in sparring and competition. My training regime is simple. Learn techniques that are suited for my body structure and drill them until my training partner is bored of me doing it. I take those techniques and practice them in sparring. Next Friday those sparring sessions and repetitions in the gym will allow me to flow. My mind is clear. Jediesque. I have one goal. Break his will to be in there with me. Make him realize he made a mistake and there is no time left to correct it.
I know he has seeds of doubt planted in his head by poor choices he has made. I know he had a baconator last week. How did that effect his training session for the day? Did he get his max reps in? I did. I am willing to bet he bought the new Call of Duty, Battlefield 3 and/or Skyrim. These games came out after we agreed to fight. I didn’t get the games, I was training. He might reason that he played at night before bed. I was watching training videos of seminars I have attended, absorbing techniques and theories. I doodled and made pictures. I took notes. I was sitting in the hot bathtub acclimatizing my body so that I will sweat more when I need to cut weight and make it easier on myself. I was reading. I didn’t go out with my friends. I said no to drinking. I said no to drugs. I said no to fast food. I said no to meals that weren’t prepared by my own hands. I said no to distractions. My real friends understand that I have a goal that I wish to accomplish and they don’t distract me from it. They encourage me to keep going, telling me that I am doing the right things. I thank them for this. I educated myself on proper nutrition and I followed the diet I have laid out for myself. I was strict when there was no need to be and it has made it easier now when it is the most important time to be strict. I want it more.
The footage of me fighting that he will have found is very old. Countless hours, countless repetitions, and countless rounds sparring have taken place since then. If I fight like that again and repeat the same mistakes I deserve to lose, but I won’t. Funny thing is I have the password for those You Tube accounts. If I didn’t want him to see those videos he wouldn’t have. I am a different animal now. I hope he trained for that boy in the videos because when he sees the man standing across from him he will realize what happened and the seeds of doubt planted in his mind will be watered by his poor choices. I am the sun and I will allow those seeds to grow and flourish. I made better choices and it has allowed me to remain calm and focused on the task at hand.
I know what the future holds for me. Victory. The only unknown to me is if the referee will raise my right hand or my left. So much I want to say but all I respond with is, “Yes, I am stoked and I am ready”.
Beetle is an MMA fighter, living in Chilliwack, BC, Canada.