Insomnia – Redux

The shimmer of a hundred disembodied spirits murmur outside my chamber window.

The patter of tumultuous rain conjures a whisper that stretches yawning into the night.

Somewhere amidst the cacophony my mind starts to wander adrift in nightmarish landscape. What an inopportune moment to be plagued by insomnia.

Heavy heat presses down my ribcage, indenting the bed I am placed upon. Sleep cannot be forced, for if it does it becomes utterly compromised. Sleep, the minor death we revisit each evening, requires a letting go; a consensual goodbye to the veneer that we call reality in order to willingly enter its twisted mirror image.

So as I lay here, dwelling in my purgatory centrally placed between dreams and waking, my mind shifts to a time years ago. Bright lights flash and the saga of my life begins to unfold.

Insomnia is an enemy that cannot be fought. My Gung Fu is rendered useless.



One Response to “Insomnia – Redux”

  1. and mine comes to life…

    beyond the mind, beyond examination or rhetoric. i love the dream state. i get to experience passion and fear and retaliation and peace and deflection and a re-living of things i wish i would’ve handled differently. it’s not “purgatory” to me — most of the time.

    and then there are those other times.

    over the past 3-4 years, i have awoken from those ‘other times’, rare but poignant, and confronted the devil with audacious aggression. any longing or fear that existed in that circumstance, pre-dream, is wiped out quickly and powerfully.

    what an evolution and relief from the ‘victim’ i played in my dreams during my twenties and early thirties.

    i welcome this mini-death.

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